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If you're considering seeing a live sex show, Casa Rosso is the original live sex show of Amsterdam. It's the one with the big pink elephant. They have smaller theatres with the same sort of thing, and the Moulin Rouge and Banana Bar are alternative spots with less people, more involvement, different acts etc.
We wanted something well attended and not too intimate - so this was what we chose. I think the people who would be bothered here don't know what to expect! The show was what I imagined having done a reasonable amount of google searching to make sure we didn't end up accidentally doing anything else. It is a live porn show with 5 minute rotating acts singles, couples etc on a stage with curtains, with a theatre style seating. We went at 9pm and there was no line up it was a Friday night.
The acts are choreographed and yes, sometimes the people involved look a bit bored but I had read that was the case and didn't expect anything else!
At the end of their day, this is their job and they choose to do it, so try not to overthink the whole process and just go with it! Tickets are expensive - 45 Euro or 55 Euro including two drinks. We got the drinks as 5 Euro per drink is pretty good value anyway. We didn't get served in our seats as we were sitting near the wall but you can get up and go to the bar. It is a bit weird sitting next to strangers in such close proximity but you quickly get over it.
Audience participation as well - you can always say no, but all up about 5 or 6 people ended up being part of an act - like a lap dance or a dance off or eating a banana off a girls belly. All in all, we enjoyed the experience - it's pretty weird and entertaining - so if you're up for something different while in Amsterdam, give it a go!